Hey all~
Buona Sera, from Italia! I’m not sure if I ever mentioned that I had traveling plans after my semester ended… I’ve been here in Rome with my uncle this weekend, and tomorrow I’m leaving for Germany for 10 days! I feel EXTREMELY lucky to have this opportunity and I’m looking forward to it! I’m having a good time here so far, but first I’ll let you know how saying goodbye to España went…

Wednesday, my last day in Granada and the date of my last entry, was… intense. I had a mild breakdown (okay, maybe not so mild) due to stress, half of it caused by yours truly, naturally. Thank goodness for long-distance calling cards!! I had two exams that day, my hardest one at 5pm that I only ended up studying for on the walk to school, for about 15 minutes. Whoops. I was also stressing out about packing, mostly because I had started at… 8:30 that morning, before my first exam. Whoops again. I haven’t been great about giving advice this semester, so here’s some if you’re looking for it: don’t do either of those things!!

Not to mention, I was just trying to deal with the reality of leaving. When I woke up that morning I could do nothing but just shake and cry. As I said… I just couldn’t believe it was happening.

As if all that wasn’t enough, I was faced once again with drama involving two people very close to me: my roommate and my host mom. This drama was never about me, but throughout the course of the last 2-3 weeks or so, I have been expected to pick sides and on various occasions, it has shifted to *my* shoulders; since I’ve been trying to stay objective and as far out of it as possible this whole time, apparently I’m the best one to solve it? Which makes sense, but every time the subject comes up I get an instant headache, and on Wednesday I was more than ready to let it pass and just forget about everything. It has taken a toll on all three of us, severed friendships and tarnished reputations and… it was pretty much the last thing I needed on Wednesday.

Thankfully I calmed down after talking with my mom several times that evening. I got my packing situation figured out, my exams came and went and I tried my best, and I gave my opinion on the drama situation and was able to more or less let it go. I had my last dinner at home: chicken noodle soup without the chicken (that’s the best way I can describe it!) and a ham and cheese bocadillo. I went out with a few friends for an hour or two; had my last bowl of Spanish gelato (a mix of raspberry and dark chocolate) and went to my favorite salsa bar, Mi Habana, for the last time. I felt like a Dancing With the Stars contestant for the last time, dancing with a good guy friend who teaches salsa, and said my goodbyes (or “hasta ahoras”, better said!) to my girlfriends.

Saying goodbye to my host family and to my house was absolutely heart-wrenching. We have all been through so much on various occasions, both good times and bad. Mamache and Rafael really have been like my Spanish parents this semester, and I just couldn’t get it through my skull that I was leaving them. I turned the lights off to my empty room and said goodbye to our guest dog that’s been staying with us for a week now (and is such a lovebug!). I gave Rafael a hug - he is the sweetest little old man, and I’m going to miss him constantly asking me how to say something in English or telling me crazy jokes. I lost it then, and when it came time to say goodbye to Mamache, we just couldn’t let each other go. I tried promising myself I wouldn’t cry but I just couldn’t help it. With a quick “te quiero, hasta AHORA” I was out the gate and in my friend’s car. That was it.

My friend drove me to the bus station, and I ended up seeing Antonio and Samantha there, too. I was happy to see them and say goodbye. The bus ride up to Madrid consisted of about 45 minutes of pure bawling, followed by immediate comatose. I listened to flamenco music (or had it playing while I was sleeping) the entire 5-hour ride.

What hurt the most, I think, was knowing that things are never going to be the same. I am never going to be at this point in my life again; once I step foot on American soil, this chapter is closing. I’m glad to have the drama behind me, but setting that all aside, this semester was everything I could have dreamed of, and even more. I have met amazing people this semester from all over the world, and I have seen more incredible things than I can count on my fingers and toes. I have learned SO much about Spain and other cultures, about myself and about those around me… I can’t say whether I’ve changed yet, because I’m still not home. I’ll definitely keep you updated throughout the summer, though

I arrived at the Madrid airport much more confident and fluent than I did last time. I actually carried on the entire conversation at the check-in desk in Spanish, which was a goal I made for myself upon arriving in January! The attendants didn’t even look at me like I was crazy or even speak English to me right away I was also talking to someone from the US while boarding the plane, and he asked me, “You understand any of this??” (referring to the flight attendants and everyone speaking Spanish - he just had a connecting flight from Boston, his final destination was Rome). I tried not to beam too hard when I answered, “Actually, I’m proud to say I do. After spending 5 months living here, I sure hope so.”

I met my uncle when I arrived on Thursday afternoon, and we hit the ground running. While I haven’t been feeling 100% this weekend - 10 bucks says it’s at least partially due to the stress from Wednesday - we’ve managed to hit up pretty much every tourist attraction in town: the Colosseum, the Basilica and Vatican Museum, the Pantheon, the Trevvi Fountains and a fair share of just walking around the city. We also got to see some Catacombs and Ostia Antica, an entire city made of ruins, about a half hour away. Since my uncle is a priest I’m staying with him at the church - which means free lodging - and not to mention, I have my own tour guide! I’m so happy that I ended up coming; amidst the panic on Wednesday I had considered delaying, or even canceling, the trip. We’ve been taking it easy lately though, and I knew I was back to almost completely myself today because I was able to gobble down an AMAZING mixture of Italian gelato: Strawberry, Pineapple and Peach! I’d argue it to be the best 4 euros I’ve spent so far. And, not to worry, I have also indulged myself in pasta, pizza, lasagna, and plenty of delicious wine!

Moreover, I’m really really thankful to have 2 weeks “rest” (so to speak) between leaving home and coming home… traveling with family will definitely be the perfect transition I need to dull the culture shock I know I am going to experience upon returning to Wisconsin. My uncle is fluent in Spanish (and English, of course!), and since he has spent many years living in Spain, I’ve been able to vent to him about the cultural differences I’m going to miss or that I’m looking forward to. It’s helped make the transition from “fluent Spanglish” to “occasionally throwing in a Spanish phrase” easier. And it’s also really cool that he’s fluent in Italian; it makes ordering at restaurants a whole lot easier, and it’s exciting for me too, since Italian is a language I would love to learn someday. I’ve been asking him a lot of questions and once I get French down, Italian is next!

Tomorrow morning I leave bright and early for Frankfurt! I’m meeting another uncle and another aunt there tomorrow afternoon, and we’ll be touring Frankfurt, Berlin, Heidelberg and Munich for 10 days. I fly back to the states on June 4.

I should probably get going… I started this entry several hours ago, but my uncle and I went out awhile ago and I was able to get my last bowl of Italian gelato: Stracciatella (chocolate chip) and chocolate, YUM. Now it’s quarter to 11 and I’ve still got to shower and get all packed up. No stressing this time, though! I’ve got some green tea here to soothe my aching throat and relax me, and hopefully when I wake up at… 4:15 tomorrow morning?… I won’t be too cranky! I’m not sure whether I’ll have internet in Germany but if I do, I’ll try my best to update. If not, talk to you again in the states! Take care all!!